Saturday, November 8, 2014

100% Satisfaction Guaranteed !

Sex sells. With no new hits on my blog and fading popularity (from 0.4/5  to 0.2 now)  I have decided to write about it. And why not, it could give a new lease of life to Vidya Balan’s career, got Shiney Ahuja lifetime achievement award, Poonam Boob Pandey has become an internet sensation just by stripping at all possible places  and for the first time all news publications including Times of India wrote about Times of India. (Ooops , I am yet to take my PF money from them).

Sex has been an underlying proposition of numerous brands which we come across day and night.  There are contraceptive companies that manage to get on board the Bollywood celebs like Ranveer Singh and Sunny Leone, buy space in premier publications, prime time on-air FCP, and have over the counter placement in retail. Then there are some genuinely talented guys who want to help the “needy”  find pleasure but sex being a taboo they are perceived as hawwwwwwwwwwwwwwww ji shame shame!

Baba Bangalis have been my favourite “Mr. Do It All”. They can help you with anything under the sun- “Filmon mein asafalta, grehklesh, saas se chutkara, kutte ko na kaat paana,  and stambhan dosh or erectile dysfunction. Clearly what science can’t do they can do it. It is possible that when Narendra Modi said Ganesha’s head is attached to a human body it wasn’t because of plastic surgery’s knowledge in ancient India, he was referring to this sacred knowledge of Baba Bangalis.

Here goes a jingle for them if ever they get enough budgets for advertising spends:

Unhorny ko horny kar de, horny ko aur horny
Ek jagah sab jama ho teeno, taaveez , goli aur baba bangaaaleeeeeeeeeee

While they operate in clandestine manner, there are other tech-savvy sex drive specialists who have made optimum use of online media. Don’t believe me , check your spam box in your mail. Mails with subject lines: Make your girl scream tonight, Big is Better etc. (hilarious, is there anyway I can work for them! ). The thing is I already have the power to make the girls scream, most scream at my fashion sense, my hairstyle, it shocks them enough, I don’t need the pills. Also, because I don’t have a dick, dickhead.

If you are a nocturnal creature there are chances you would have stumbled upon Payal Rohatgi promoting ‘Product of the Year’,  Shakti Praash.  The show should have been named Adult Comedy Nights with Payal Rohatgi.  She warns you with an accent- ägar aapki patni aapse saantusht nahi hai toh aapka vaivahik jeevan khuraab ho jaega (ok).  Wonder what will happen to her vaivahik jeevan after this! Of course it is not her fault, maybe the dialogue writer had tried a spoonful of Shakti Praash before reporting to work.  Some chosen dialogues have the honour of being a part of this blog:

  • -          Mere husband dekhne mein boht hi lambe aur chaude hain, shaadi se pehle main unhe dekha toh mujhe laga ki mere pati mujhe har prakaar se khush rahenge .. lekin,, shaadi ke baad khoda pahaad nikli chuhiya waali khahawat jaise unpe sach hi ho gayi thi .. (lmao)

  • -          (50 year old husband) Shakti Praash ke sevan se meri jawani wapas aa gayi hai  (looks at his wife and says cheesily ) kyu ji thik keh raha hu na?.. aaj kal hum daily honeymoon manate hain!!   (tharki Buddha)

Please spare some time from your busy lives to watch this show starring these stalwarts.

Aap sex ke peeche, libido aapke peeche.. too much fun!

There is no concrete study available on the size of Ayurvedic industry and its registered practitioners. Moreover Ayurveda can fall easily into Grandmom’s secrets for beauty to medicines that cure fatal diseases. How does then one tap these shady companies that are proliferating in the name of Ayurveda and selling illegally. It would be wise to consider how much money therefore goes unaccounted for.

However, Shakti Praash did get me contemplating on one aspect. In marriages (especially arranged) how do people get to know about their partner’s Shakti? It is so ‘impotent’ to know that about your partner, no? Let me know in the comments below. No, actually I don’t want to know your creepy stories! 


  1. Creepy story loading....oh no wait...I'll inbox it to you :-p

    Laughed till my jaws hurt....hehehe....nice work! Keep it rolling ;-)

  2. ROFL,You make my day!

  3. As Panteras Porno quando se tem uma familia que adora uma boa orgia nem precisa ir procura na rua o jeito e resolver em casa mesmo e tudo fica maravilhoso bem. o sexo dessa galera vai esta ali a mil grau com os taradinhos mais quente vai rola aquele incesto bem espqcial que vai levar a todos ao delirio total. mais o que eles querem de verdade e meter e da aquela boa gozada e fazer muito sexo anal ate mesmo uma boa dupla penetração pode rola com eles. O bom que importa e que o sexo em Gozando Em Familia Sexsites vai rolar solto.
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